New Variation on an Old Theme

A cool thing happened about 15 years ago (possibly earlier, but that was when "beauty" entered my world). The obsession with tanning and dark skin led to the creation of Self Tanners: Magical potions that overnight would turn you a shade darker (or a shade oranger, in some cases). Being blessed with pale skin and legs that DEFY TANNING, I tried them ALL. Even Toma's Tan Perfect - which, by the way, remains as the best one I've ever used. However it is WAY too involved. I don't have that kind of time in my life.

So, self tanning was all the rage for about 10 years. There were ones with bronzers, ones with shimmer, ones that braided your hair and sang you to sleep. But through it all, women were tan, but not totally pleased: the ankles! The lines on the feet! The drying! The OBVIOUS mistakes! What do we do? This product is not perfect, and we demand perfection!

Enter gradual tanners. Applied like a lotion, this will, over time, develop your optimal tan without the heinous streaks and dark ankles and knees. HALLELUJAH! Women the world over rejoiced and ran out in droves. Soon, these had bronzers, shimmers, firming potions...we had a new way of tanning. And it was awesome. I'm a believer. But I wasn't a difficult convert, seeing as how my veins on my legs are visible through my skin...

Now, Jergens has produced this:

Yes. That's right sports fans. It's gradual tanner, but FASTER. So, like gradual, but instead, not. Sounds amazingly like - TA DA! - Self tanner! I should be a brain surgeon.

And let me tell you: that's exactly what it is. I know. Because I bought it.

Now, many women across the country are running out in droves to buy this, because it is NEW AND AMAZING. Guess what? It's not new. But it IS amazing. I bought it, knowing full well that it was exactly what I gave up in favor of gradual.

And now that I have shown just exactly how ahead of the Jergens Marketing Dept I am, here is my review:

I bought this on sale at CVS, where it is normally $7.99, which is not bad. It is a small bottle, but it says it only needs 3 days, so who needs more product? Plus, I had a $2 off coupon.

So I ran home yesterday with my new/old product in my hot little hands, showered and immediately applied. I then went to play football and promptly forgot about it, until later last night, when I was studying, looked down at my legs and (literally) said, "Hot damn! When did my legs get so tan!" I had, by this point, forgotten I'd applied. For a split second. Then I got really excited. I reapplied after the post-football shower last night. My legs are dark as hell. At least, for me. I wore a skirt today, in honor of the fact that my legs looked good enough to pull it off! Very, very exciting.

Ok, getting serious now:

* This stuff is MUCH like the self-tanners we all know and love - I have lines on my feet and two random spots on the front of my neck from not being careful enough in my application. I will not make this mistake tomorrow.

* I, of course, bought the darker shade, because I am just WILD like that. However, it's pretty dark, especially since I'm only on day 2 of the magical 3. I think it looks ok on me because I'm yellow-pale, rather than most people's pink-pale. For all my pink friends, I'd say go with the lighter shade - this stuff is powerful! Also on pink pale, it may turn orange. Plus, seriously, it's $8 lost if I'm wrong.